BRIDGET - oil on paper

...



Bridget
oil on paper
11" x 15"



pencil layout


black layout

"BRIDGET"
oil on paper
after: roy lichtenstein - "girl with hair ribbon 1965"
11" x 15" quarter imperial cold pressed 300gms paper
not for sale

she didn't accept it as her christmas gift
.:.

...

my Uncle died in intensive care in hospital

HE DIDN'T HAVE KIDNEY FAILURE
HE DIDN'T HAVE HEART FAILURE
HE DIDN'T HAVE PNEUMONIA
UNTIL YOU THREW HIM IN PRISON FOR BUYING WEED

he was 63 years old & in poor health
AND YOU FUCKING MURDERED HIM
he died all alone with no one there for him

now that I'd found him again
I wanted to know all about him
I wanted to know about my granddad
I wanted him to teach me how to paint
I wanted him to live with us
I was going to sleep on the sofa so he had a bed

AND YOU FUCKING MURDERED HIM

.:.

...

...
my uncle fred is just about to die in hospital
because of the bad weather I can't get to him
he's in intensive care
he's unconscious
he's all alone

Two years later you're still on my mind

...
Someday we'll know why Samson loved Delilah
One day I'll go dancing on the moon
Someday you'll know that I was the one for you





90 miles outside Chicago
Can't stop driving
I don't know why
So many questions
I need an answer
Two years later
You're still on my mind

Whatever happened to Amelia Earhart?
Who holds the stars up in the sky?
Is true love just once in a lifetime?
Did the captain of the Titanic cry?

Someday we'll know if love can move a mountain
Someday we'll know why the sky is blue
Someday we'll know why I wasn't meant for you

Does anybody know the way to Atlantis
Or what the wind says when she cries?
I'm speeding by the place that I met you
For the 97th time tonight

Someday we'll know if love can move a mountain
Someday we'll know why the sky is blue
Someday we'll know why I wasn't meant for you
Someday we'll know why Samson loved Delilah
One day I'll go dancing on the moon
Someday you'll know that I was the one for you

I bought a ticket to the end of the rainbow
I watched the stars crash in the sea
If I could ask God just one question
Why aren't you here with me tonight?

Someday we'll know if love can move a mountain
Someday we'll know why the sky is blue
Someday we'll know why I wasn't meant for you
Someday we'll know why Samson loved Delilah
One day I'll go dancing on the moon
Someday you'll know that I was the One for you


two years later you're still on my mind
.:.

all this talking is only bravado

...

when he used to be beating me
he used to say things to me
he told me how none of my family cared about me
he told me how they wouldn’t do anything to help me
he told me it wouldn’t matter what I said none of them would believe me
he told me none of them would bother

to this day I still believe him, no one cares, no one will help
I couldn’t tell my mum because she was the person supporting him
there was nobody to turn to just waiting for him to kill me, for 11 years
I've always felt not wanted
I’m afraid when my mum dies I will just end up homeless again

from the age of 9 I believed he was going to murder me
from the age of 9 I lived in terror of him going to kill me any second

when I've been low, living in a doss house when someone sneaks in behind me & starts hitting me in the face with a piece of wood, when I've been really low no family was there, no family cared I was all alone

every day is why didn’t you kill yourself why don’t you kill your self
I am still terrified to this day that he will kill me
I am still terrified to this day that someone will kill me
everytime I go out the door & now inside my house
if I don’t kill myself then I know someone else will
some cunt like a drunk angus swan

I still live with these things every second of every day
these are the nightmares I can’t wake up from
no one cares or ever will
I should kill myself
it will be weeks before they “find” my body

this is why I smoke cannabis – no you won’t stop me, you just don’t fucking get it do you? Go on explain to me how you get it? – it numbs everything. after years of being numb I can try & function close to something like normal because everything is dead. just as long as I have something to do just so long as I have something to live for the alternative is not being numb & killing myself
this is why I’ve been homeless & lived in a doss house, it has never mattered
I have a sister who would prefer it if I wasn’t around so she could get back to a relationship with her dad & cousins who could care less

I’m 43 & know things will never change
I don’t want to be alone but that’s all I will ever be
*****************************
I can’t take anymore
from being shoved around as the bastard baby to being physically assaulted wherever I’ve lived or wherever I’ve worked to the police lying to me breaking their oath to protect me I can’t face it anymore, years of this
I’m just the worthless piece of shit he said I was

.:.

Tinsel town in the rain

...
Do I love you ? Yes, I love you
Will we always be happy go lucky ?
Do I love you ? Yes, I love you
But it's easy come & it's easy go
All this talking is only bravado




Why did we ever come so far ?
I knew I'd seen it all before
Tall building reach up in vain
Tinseltown is in the rain
I know now love was so exciting

Tinseltown in the rain, all men & women
Here we are, caught up in this big rhythm

One day this love will all blow over
Time for leaving the parade
Is there a place in this city?
A place to always feel this way
And hey, there's a red car in the fountain

Tinseltown in the rain, all men & women
Here we are, caught up in this big rhythm

Do I love you ? Yes, I love you
Will we always be happy go lucky ?
Do I love you ? Yes, I love you
But it's easy come & it's easy go
All this talking is only bravado

Oh, Tinseltown, Tinseltown is in the rain
Tinseltown in the rain, all men & women
Here we are, caught up in this big rhythm

Tinseltown in the rain, all men and women
Here we are, caught up in this big rhythm
Tinseltown is in the rain, Tinseltown is in the rain
Tinseltown is in the rain, Tinseltown is in the rain

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Do I love you ? Yes, I love you
Will we always be happy go lucky ?
Do I love you ? Yes, I love you
But it's easy come & it's easy go
All this talking is only bravado

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
.:.

Stop that Train

...
All my good life I've been a lonely man
Teachin' my people who don't understand
And even though I tried my best
I still can't find no happiness

Stop that train: I'm leavin'
Stop that train: I'm leavin' - anyway now!
Stop that train: I'm leavin'. And I'm a tell ya:
It won't be too long whether I'm right or wrong;
I said, it won't be too long whether I'm right or wrong.

All my good life I've been a lonely man,
Teachin' my people who don't understand;
And even though I tried my best,
I still can't find no happiness.

So I got to say:
Stop that train: I'm leavin' - gotta believe me now
Stop that train: I'm leavin' - nothin' to stop me now
Stop that train: I'm leavin'. I keep on tellin that
It won't be too long whether I'm right or wrong;
Said, it won't be too long whether I'm right or wrong.

Some goin' east; some goin' west,
Some stand aside to try their best.
Some livin' big, but the most is livin' small::
They just can't even find no food at all.

I mean, stop it:
Stop that train: I'm leavin' - right now
Stop that train: I'm leavin' - any minute now
Stop that train: I'm leavin'. cos I'm a tellin that
It won't be too long whether I'm right or wrong;
I said it won't be too long whether I'm right or wrong.

Stop that train: I'm leavin' - fed up now
Stop that train: I'm leavin' - can't take it!
Stop that train: I'm leavin' - got to be better!
It won't be too long whether I'm right or wrong;
I said it won't be too long whether I'm right or wrong
.:.

Kathy's Song

...
And so you see I have come to doubt
All that I once held as true
I stand alone without beliefs
The only truth I know is you.





Kathy's Song

I hear the drizzle of the rain
Like a memory it falls
Soft and warm continuing
Tapping on my roof and walls.

And from the shelter of my mind
Through the window of my eyes
I gaze beyond the rain-drenched streets
To England where my heart lies.

My mind's distracted and diffused
My thoughts are many miles away
They lie with you when you're asleep
And kiss you when you start your day.

And a song I was writing is left undone
I don't know why I spend my time
Writing songs I can't believe
With words that tear and strain to rhyme.

And so you see I have come to doubt
All that I once held as true
I stand alone without beliefs
The only truth I know is you.

And as I watch the drops of rain
Weave their weary paths and die
I know that I am like the rain
There but for the grace of you go I.
.:.

why is it always happening to me

...
I was arrested yesterday for allegedly sending in threats via email to an MEP & MSP.
the email is sent through a legitimate sanctioned website where you don't have annonimity & use full name address & postcode:
http://www.writetothem.com/

the various MSP's/MEP's/MP's that you select are then sent your message via the website & you don't have their email address's, so there were at least 10+ who all got the same messages which were :
"if you aquiesce & give tacit consent to the private banking cartel of the bank of england printing our money supply as an interest debt when the governement can print all out money debt free, then you are committing treason in the robbery of the state & the citizens of the state & you should be sacked immediately, gotten rid of, without benefit or pension"
&
"I demand a criminal investigation into the systematic sexual abuse of Hollie Greig & 7 other named people by a paedophile ring involving a police officer a member of the judiciary & social workers in Aberdeen & criminal charges being brought against the guilty & that the D notices be dropped"
I did make them write all this down into evidence, as they say "anything I say maybe taken down & used in evidence"

I was arrested in my home & charged with two counts of sending threats via email using this website, hopefully the court will recognise the police's bemusement for this alleged crime of threats & drop this case
the peebles police had been requested by strathclyde police to arrest me & did admit to not quite clearly seeing why I was being arrested after reading out my alleged threats
to be continued when I get the summons in the mail

this is all about my sister & her husband applying for a Visa to the US & has fuckall to do with sending threats via email as there were no threats sent just protest & objection - a fucking disgrace
you really have me thinking fuck it all, I can't cope with this shit anymore
I wish I could start again or kill myself - whichever's easist




.:.

Picasso - Tete d'Homme 1908

...
after: Picasso - Tete d'Homme 1908




COPY ART
after: Picasso - Tete d'Homme - Spring 1908
oil on paper - water mixable zinc white lamp black
11" x 15" quarter imperial cold pressed 300gms paper
£50 +p&p & insurance

http://picasso.shsu.edu/index.php?view=ArtworkInfo&OPPID=OPP.08%3A251

I showed it at facebook, where I was asked "why [do] such as sad painting?" - I explained that I was just teaching myself to paint & wanted a challenge [so chose Picasso]
then it became clear, it was a sad painting, it has taken me about a month to do during which I have really struggled over lost love & past history... closer to the edge

maybe there is more to the comment than I first realised
maybe it chose itself because of my situation
maybe it needed to be done
.:.

can't we at least be friends

...

I am trying
I only made those offers because I thought that's what friends did
& don't say they don't because it's exactly what friends do
not really gone in for friends since I was 16 so I'm not sure what to do, cut off all ties to people years ago

I occupy my time with artwork
& looking after a disable parent - some say if you're the child of a single parent you won't start to live your life until they pass on


[ to be continued ]


.:.

Something Worth Living For

...
I think I might have found the start for my valentines poem for Bridget Burnett
"Something Worth Living For"
ok so it's only one line & it may not even end up in it
but it's a start
& that's what you need

I want to express how I feel
& that I know she's married with two children & that why on earth would she even consider loosing that for a worthless piece of shit like me - & that she's chosen not too
I was never meant to be this & I was never meant to be here
but I am
I am trying to get my way out


[after 3 days graft it has finally taken shape I'll share the first line "the last of this years roses" but not showing any more until after 14th feb valentine' day when it has been printed in her local newspaper, so she won't miss it ]
.:.

VOTE ROBERT GREEN & END PAEDOPHILIA IN SCOTLAND

...
A CASE CLOSE TO MY FESTERING PATHETIC HEART
THAT OF HOLLIE GRIEG
SHE WAS PASSED AROUND A PAEDOPHILE RING IN SCOTLAND FOR YEARS
THIS RING INCLUDES JUDGES DOCTORS POLICE OFFICERS MEDICAL STAFF & LOTS OF "HIGH-RANKING POWER PEOPLE"

PLEASE VOTE FOR ROBERT GREEN

PLEASE VOTE FOR ROBERT GREEN IF HE WINS IT GETS REPORTED IN THE NEWS WHICH WILL BE A FIRST STEP IN ENDING THIS TRAVESTY OF JUSTICE

PLEASE VOT FOR ROBERT GREEN

THE STORY HAS BEEN BANNED BY THE LORD ADVOCATE FOR SCOTLAND AS SHE TRIES TO COVER UP WHAT HER PAEDOPHILE FRIENDS ARE DOING - DON'T BELIEVE WHAT YOU READ IN THE SCOTSMAN! THIS IS WHY SHE HAS STEPPED DOWN TO PREVENT THE CURRENT DEMANDS FROM THE SCOTTISH PUBLIC ON WHY SHE BLOCKED ACCESS TO INFORMATION REGARDING THIS SUBJECT



PLEASE VOTE FOR ROBERT GREEN

THANK YOU FOR YOUR HELP ON THIS ONE
.:.

hello

er... didn't really think anybody bothered reading my blog (been a few years & nobody has before(judging by the numbers))
so I er kind of wrote things that maybe if someone was reading I shouldn't have really written
hope you're not offended?
I'll try to moderate my "outbursts" to be more acceptable to the public
anyway hello, hope you are well & thanks.

TEN STOREY LOVE SONG

...

WHEN YOUR HEART IS BLACK AND BROKEN
AND YOU NEED A HELPING HAND
WHEN YOU'RE SO MUCH IN LOVE
YOU DON'T KNOW JUST HOW MUCH YOU CAN STAND
WHEN YOUR QUESTIONS GO UNANSWERED
AND THE SILENCE IS KILLING YOU...

WHEN YOUR HEART IS BLACK AND BROKEN
AND YOU NEED A HELPING HAND
WHEN YOU'RE SO MUCH IN LOVE
YOU DON'T KNOW JUST HOW MUCH YOU CAN STAND
WHEN YOUR QUESTIONS GO UNANSWERED
AND THE SILENCE IS KILLING YOU
TAKE MY HAND BABY I'M YOUR MAN
I GOT LOVING ENOUGH FOR TWO

TEN STOREY LOVE SONG
I BUILT THIS THING FOR YOU
WHO CAN TAKE YOU HIGHER THAN TWIN PEAK MOUNTAIN BLUE?
OH WELL, I BUILT THIS THING FOR YOU
AND I LOVE YOU TRUE

THERE'S NO SURE-FIRE SET SOLUTIONS
NO SHORTCUT THROUGH THE TREES
NO BREACH IN THE WALL THAT THEY PUT THERE TO KEEP YOU FROM ME
AS YOU'RE LYING AWAKE IN THIS DARKNESS
THIS EVERLASTING NIGHT
SOME DAY SOON DON'T KNOW WHERE OR WHEN
YOU'RE GONNA WAKE UP AND SEE THE LIGHT

TEN STOREY LOVE SONG
I BUILT THIS THING FOR YOU
WHO CAN TAKE YOU HIGHER THAN TWIN PEAK MOUNTAIN BLUE?
OH WELL, I BUILT THIS THING FOR YOU
AND I LOVE YOU TRUE

TEN STOREY LOVE SONG
I BUILT THIS THING FOR YOU
WHO CAN TAKE YOU HIGHER THAN TWIN PEAK MOUNTAIN BLUE?
OH WELL, I BUILT THIS THING FOR YOU
AND I LOVE YOU TRUE


because I love you true
.:.

...

I’m so sick of hurting you
everytime I do something stupid I know I am hurting you
& all I seem to do is stupid things & hurt you
I know how badly I am effecting your health
I know I am killing you
I don’t want to hurt you anymore

If I kill myself then it will be over with
no more angus swan no more neighbours no more anything
& no more hurting you

EDUCATE YOURSELF

...




.:.

Big Hallucination

And if I open my heart to you
And show you my weak side
What would you do?

I never had the nerve to make the final cut

The Final Cut (Waters)

Through the fish-eyed lens of tear stained eyes
I can barely define the shape of this moment in time
And far from flying high in clear blue skies
I'm spiraling down to the hole in the ground where I hide.

If you negotiate the minefield in the drive
And beat the dogs and cheat the cold electronic eyes
And if you make it past the shotgun in the hall,
Dial the combination, open the priesthole
And if I'm in I'll tell you what's behind the wall.

There's a kid who had a big hallucination
Making love to girls in magazines.
He wonders if you're sleeping with your new found faith.
Could anybody love him
Or is it just a crazy dream?

And if I show you my dark side
Will you still hold me tonight?
And if I open my heart to you
And show you my weak side
What would you do?
Would you sell your story to Rolling Stone?
Would you take the children away
And leave me alone?
And smile in reassurance
As you whisper down the phone?
Would you send me packing?
Or would you take me home?

Thought I oughta bare my naked feelings,
Thought I oughta tear the curtain down.
I held the blade in trembling hands
Prepared to make it but just then the phone rang
I never had the nerve to make the final cut.

"Hello? Listen, I think I've got it. Okay, listen its a HaHa!"

when I was a child '79 '80 '81 it was safer to wander the streets of a suburb of Bolton than it was to be at home I would hide out anywhere that was dry out of the rain & snow old buildings powerunits half built houses because I feared that he would kill me if I was at home there were no friends to hide out with until it was time to go home leaving it until the last seconds to run inside & upstairs to bed I'd spent the last four years praying to god fanatically but had given up believing in a god that would let this happen to me I ran away to kill myself at sixteen but I made my grandmother cry I'd never seen her cry & felt so ashamed that I had done so instead I hid in her airing cupboard for six months only coming out at night when it was safe

I never had the nerve to make the final cut

.:.

I SHALL BE FREE

The red velvet curtain draws back to reveal
The place where the dark side meets the angel in me...

The Flickering Flame

When my neurons conspire to
direct my thoughts
Away from divorce and competitive sports
Back to the place where all
rivers run to the sea
Then I shall be free
Yes I shall be free

On a see-saw in a strange land
The jackdaw sat on the Cardinal's hand
And the fiddlers played
And the planners plan what would be
On a back seat in a court room
Sat Molly Malone and Leopold Bloom
Until the police came down with a new broom
And swept them clean

Like Geronimo
Like Quinn the Eskimo
Like the Blackfoot
And like the Arapaho
Like Crazy Horse
I'll be the last one to lay down my gun

On the open road in a bar room
A pick up band plays a new tune
When the coloured girls sing
I feel my heart swoon
When a new song
hits the right note
When a clearing sky saves an old boat
When an insight strikes the mote
From mine own eye

Like Geronimo
Like Quinn the Eskimo
Like the Blackfoot
And like the Arapaho
Like Crazy Horse
I'll be the last one to lay down my gun

Just out of sight
Beyond the next range
I'll feel the heat of a flickering flame

On an African Plain by a thorn tree
My old friend Philippe is waiting for me
Que cera, cera
What ever will be will be
When a friend dies and the tears rise
From that deep well that never runs dry
And the women break their bracelets
And the men take their whisky outside

In a pied-a-terre on the rue St Denis
The red velvet curtain draws back to reveal
The place where the dark side
meets the angel in me
The angel in me

When my synapses pause in my
quest for applause
When my ego lets go of my end of the bone
To focus instead on the love
that is precious to me
Then I shall be free
I shall be free

by Roger Waters
.:.

one of my turns...

...

When your husband used to be beating me to death
He used to say things to me
He told me how none of my family cared about me
How they wouldn’t help me
Wouldn’t matter what I said none of them would believe me
None of them would do anything
to this day I still believe him, none of them cares, no one would help

all I knew until I was 42 was this woman who gave birth to me agreed with everything her husband was doing to me
supporting him in everything
it was all I've ever known for all my life
how could I have known what he was doing to you too? how could I have known he was beating you? how could I have known he was throwing you down stairs too? how could I have known he was making sure you were having that abortion at the ends of his fists? how could I have known how brainwashed you were?
it just makes everything worse

From the age of 9 I believed he was going to murder me
From the age of 9
I lived in terror of him going to kill me any second
until I was 18 & you then abandoned me & made me homeless, I had no family no friends no job, I had to break in to the shed in the graveyard to have somewhere dry to sleep I never saw you for 4 years I never saw my sister for 6 years


when I've been low, living in a doss house when someone sneaks in behind me & starts hitting me in the face with a piece of wood, when I've been really low no family was there, no family cared I was alone lost nothing no one cared



I still live with these things every second of every day
these are the nightmares I can’t wake up from
no one cares or ever will
it will be weeks before they “find” my body



I’m 43 & know things will never change





.:.

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

...

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play makes Jack a dull boy

all work & no play...

leaves Jack broken hearted & lost

.:.

Picasso : Tete d'Homme 1908

Picasso : Tete d'Homme 1908

...
COPY ART
after: Picasso - Tete d'Homme - Spring 1908
oil on paper - zinc white lamp black
charcoal layout
11" x 15" quarter imperial cold pressed 300gms paper
£50 +p&p & insurance

http://picasso.shsu.edu/index.php?view=ArtworkInfo&OPPID=OPP.08%3A251




I know I'm fooling no one, least of all myself
.:.

EBAY SALE : BUY THEM NOW £75+p&p each

EBAY SALE : BUY THEM NOW £75+p&p each

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=120616985971

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=120617020106


http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=120617040836

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=120617047470

EBAY SALE : BUY THEM NOW £75+p&p each

every day

.:.

Picasso: Mandoline sur un guéridon - 11 Feb 1920

Picasso - Mandoline sur un guéridon - 11 Feb 1920




...
COPY ART
after: Picasso - Mandoline sur un guéridon - 11 Feb 1920
watercolour on paper [original is gouache on cardboard]
11" x 15" quarter imperial cold pressed 300gms paper
£50 +p&p & insurance
http://picasso.shsu.edu/index.php?view=ArtworkInfo&OPPID=OPP.20%3A013


I have this painting:




I can't do it
I quickly realised that I wasn't at a good enough level to do this as I specifically wanted to do
so I went back to artist that are paid a pretty decent wage for doing art & looked again at what they said
a main theme was to do "copy art" as a route to experience how someone did a piece & therefore also learn various painting techniques
which is why I'm at this point of doing Copy Art
I hope to end this at something like a cubist piece, brushstroke for brushstroke so you have to look twice just to make sure it's not the original
then move onto this painting
I've bought some water mixable oil paints: titanium white - raw sienna - lamp black

I'm already starting to look at it in terms of how to apply paint to it
creative visualisation




blank:blank:heart-broken:blank:lost:blank:blank:blank
.:.

always the same

nothing ever changes, you never change







I was outside taking some pictures of the sky & clouds for reference for some painting or other further down the line when this older woman, say retired early, came round the corner of the house "oh are you copying me?" in this fucking patronising voice well actually no I'm not copying you you are the same person that when I was four stopped me drawing night scenes in class, made me stand outside the class & I was forced to get someone round to school to tell you that you didn't tell me what to do as far as art was concerned, I decided that, you're that same person who stopped me telling my own mother when I had a poem published when I was ten, you're that same person that who left me without a pencil to even drawn with by the time I was 14, only expressing myself in biology & geography & technical in physics, you're the same person who used to take my songs put other music to it then use it to take the piss out of me humiliate me & use it to just down grade any effort until I gave up writing songs
you're always the same nothing ever changes & no one thing I am not fucking doing is copying you rant over



you are not helping you are part of the problem
.:.

My Spice Infusion Drink

I've done some searching on the net & came together with this "tea"




in this image:
lemon juice / honey / turmeric / cayenne pepper / cardamon pods / ginger powder

the idea behind this drink was to find something soothing, good for aches & pains, good for arthritis & nice to drink (prevention is better than cure)
the turmeric is now a proven aid to all aches & pains/circulation/arthritis/antiseptic/antibacterial agent/natural liver detoxifier/natural painkiller/rheumatoid arthritis/prostate cancer
the cardamon pods improve digestion & stimulate the metabolism/detoxifies/cleanses the kidneys/stimulates digestive system
the cayenne pepper is an excellent - from my trials - head soother/stop heart attacks/re-build stomach tissue/heal stomach ulcers/lowers cholesterol/removes toxins from the bloodstream/equalizes blood pressure
the ginger powder is antiemetic/antinausea/anticlotting agent/antispasmodic/antifungal/anti-inflammatory/antiseptic/antibacterial/antiviral/antitussive/analgesic/circulatory stimulant/increases blood flow/relaxes peripheral blood vessels

infact if you have the start of a migraine, you know when it's starting & you know how bad it is going to be, then try this drink :)
[I'm not suggesting it will get rid of your migraine - I am suggesting that it will make it a little bit easier - plus having what I hope is a good mixture & just the right amount of spices soothing your stomach will help you not feeling so sick]

to make :
a mug & one half of water
one eighth level teaspoon turmeric
one eighth level teaspoon cayenne pepper
one eighth level teaspoon ginger powder
three cardamon pods - broken open
one teaspoon lemon juice
one teaspoon honey

add all but the last two ingredients to a small pan with a mug & a half of water
bring to the boil & boil for seven minutes (depends on how hard it's boiling)
add the teaspoon of honey & lemon
continue to boil for a further three minutes
use a sieve to strain off the floaters
then enjoy
I suggest 1 mug a day if suffering from general aches & pains
& can personally recommend it as a first thing in the morning drink for an extra kick-start



unfortunately has no effect on a broken heart, doesn't get rid of that sickness
.:.

THINKING IS THE NEW BLACK

COPY ART
after: PICASSO - Mandoline sur un guéridon - 11 Feb 1920
watercolour on paper [original is gouache on cardboard]
charcoal layout
11" x 17" quarter imperial cold pressed 300gms paper
£50 +p&p & insurance

http://picasso.shsu.edu/index.php?view=ArtworkInfo&OPPID=OPP.20%3A013


keep doing this keep my mind occupied keep from thinking about it all
.:.

THERAPY [BLANK]

...




...
COPY ART
after: Picasso - Compotier et mandoline sur un buffet IV - 13th March 1920
watercolour on paper (- original is gouache on paper)
11" x 17" quarter imperial cold pressed 300gms paper
http://picasso.shsu.edu/index.php?view=ArtworkInfo&OPPID=OPP.20%3A218

£40 +p&p & insurance



BLANK
BLANK
BLANK
BLANK
BLANK
BLANK
BLANK
BLANK
BLANK
BLANK
BLANK
BLANK
BLANK


.:.

THERAPY

...
COPY ART
after: Picasso - Compotier et mandoline sur un buffet IV - 13th March 1920
charcoal layout
??? on paper (- original is gouache on paper)
11" x 17" quarter imperial cold pressed 300gms paper
http://picasso.shsu.edu/index.php?view=ArtworkInfo&OPPID=OPP.20%3A218

as it was beginning to feel a bit like the worthless piece of shit I know I am
I come across the on-line Picasso Project

I know how important art can be as therapy so I've decided to try myself at COPY ART
see where it goes
it will keep my mind off her

‎
We need Joy as we need air. We need Love as we need water. We need each other as we need the earth we share
- Maya Angelou

CRUSHED
I wish I knew what to do
.:.

HEY YOU! [the lost plot]

...
COPY ART
after: roy lichtenstein - hey you! 1973
acrylic on canvas
30cm x 40cm
£50 +p&p & insurance


CRUSHED


"We need Joy as we need air.We need Love as we need water.We need each other as we need the earth we share."
- Maya Angelou

[it's all lies]
.:.

HEY YOU [aka losing the plot]

...
COPY ART
after: roy lichtenstein - hey you 1973
acrylic on canvas - black layout
30cm x 40cm
£50 +p&p & insurance



"I can tell you what I mean by total confusion - it's not knowing up from down, left from right, not knowing right from wrong or knowing stupid from common sense. doing something stupid & wrong but think I'm doing something right. failing to see that I could possibly be wrong - that's falling for you. I've had relationships before but only because I needed one, nothing no one like you. I've never looked for love & I was planning on there never being any at all, before you. I haven't had sex in 15 years I've been that much into not looking. Then there's you & everything collapsed.
it took me over a month to pluck up the courage to say to you "you look like you'll be trouble" ax"

Hey You (Waters) 4:39 Hey you, out there in the cold Getting lonely, getting old Can you feel me? Hey you, standing in the aisles With itchy feet and fading smiles Can you feel me? Hey you, dont help them to bury the light Don't give in without a fight. Hey you, out there on your own Sitting naked by the phone Would you touch me? Hey you, with you ear against the wall Waiting for someone to call out Would you touch me? Hey you, would you help me to carry the stone? Open your heart, I'm coming home. But it was only fantasy. The wall was too high, As you can see. No matter how he tried, He could not break free. And the worms ate into his brain. Hey you, standing in the road always doing what you're told, Can you help me? Hey you, out there beyond the wall, Breaking bottles in the hall, Can you help me? Hey you, don't tell me there's no hope at all Together we stand, divided we fall.

.:.

do love Picasso so

http://picasso.shsu.edu/index.php
do love Picasso so
http://picasso.shsu.edu/index.php

.:.

HEY YOU!

...
COPY ART
after: roy lichtenstein - hey you 1973
acrylic on canvas - charcoal layout
30cm x 40cm
£50 +p&p & insurance

Hey You (Waters) 4:39 Hey you, out there in the cold Getting lonely, getting old Can you feel me? Hey you, standing in the aisles With itchy feet and fading smiles Can you feel me? Hey you, dont help them to bury the light Don't give in without a fight. Hey you, out there on your own Sitting naked by the phone Would you touch me? Hey you, with you ear against the wall Waiting for someone to call out Would you touch me? Hey you, would you help me to carry the stone? Open your heart, I'm coming home. But it was only fantasy. The wall was too high, As you can see. No matter how he tried, He could not break free. And the worms ate into his brain. Hey you, standing in the road always doing what you're told, Can you help me? Hey you, out there beyond the wall, Breaking bottles in the hall, Can you help me? Hey you, don't tell me there's no hope at all Together we stand, divided we fall. [Click of TV being turned on] "Well, only got an hour of daylight left. Better get started" "Isnt it unsafe to travel at night?" "It'll be a lot less safe to stay here. You're father's gunna pick up our trail before long" "Can Loca ride?" "Yeah, I can ride... Magaret, time to go! Maigret, thank you for everything" "Goodbye Chenga" "Goodbye miss ..." "I'll be back"

.:.

something to live for?

...


COPY ART - after: roy lichtenstein - pistol 1964
acrylic on canvas
30cm x 40cm
£50 +p&p & insurance



it's not what he did to me
that was physical
& years have passed
it is the nightmare he has left me with
that being I am a worthless piece of shit that doesn't deserve to live
that's the nightmare I can't wake up from
that's the nightmare that keeps me down stairs on the sofa
that's the nightmare that rules my life restricting my every tun
now if people understand this then I can trust them & we can move forward & hopefully leave it behind

can you understand why I need something to live for?
I'm not it, just the worthless piece of shit that doesn't deserve to live
on a psychological level it really is something I think I have to do/be/have
if I don't then one day I worry that I might just do it
if I have something to live for then I will be functioning on something close to a "normal level"
it is something I would do well, I am subservient to everything, I can't help it, it's all that's left
it took years after to just stop doing whatever anybody said
it took me even longer to stop physically flinching if anyone moved near me
if I had something to live for then I really would be alive

I thought/think I've found someone that is worth living for
.:.

A POEM FOR BRIDGET

I would have bought you roses
To show you that I care
To show how much I love you
My bleeding heart laid bare

But to love you is heartbreaking
To know you're just not there
What would I give to hold you
Though your wish is not to care

I would have bought you roses
To show my love was true
Except I write here broken-hearted
I am so in love with you

...
working on another
they don't come as easily as they used to
but then I've never been broken hearted before

there was one before her, but the 10 year age difference was too much for her so she went back to her ex-husband
& about 16 years ago a rather pathetic "relationship" that lasted 4 months until she decided to bring home the man she had been fucking on holiday & so that was that
& before that what can only be described as degrading & humiliating experiences for the poor women involved in my drunken attempts to have sex about 6 times
there's nothing to give me the experience to handle her not being there
I don't know what to do
I'm lost & making so many many mistakes
honestly don't see the point in continuing
I've not felt like this since I was 16 & failed to kill myself
guess it's just another regret to add to my life of regrets
I see why nobody has slept with me for over 15 years

when I was a child & he used to beat me near to death
he used to say things to me as he was doing it
he told me that this would never happen for me
I was scared
you are so beautiful & you were saying all those things to me
I ran away because it was easier to do than believe you
how could I believe you? (you are beautiful you are everything)
why would you be saying those things?
you couldn't have meant them?
& you couldn't have meant them for me anyway?
it was all I knew
my only experience was being told that it would never happen for me
I wanted you to understand
but you wouldn't, you just left
& now I cry every day
.:.

FOR SALE : ART WORK

...
if I wasn't doing this "copy art" I don't think I would be doing anything
didn't think it would effect me so badly
but then again she was the only one
so everything she said ...




.:.

FOR SALE : ART WORK

...
more art
if I wasn't doing this "copy art" I don't think I would be doing anything

so everything she said...





.:.

It’s alright to be afraid... because this part won’t be like a comic book... real life doesn’t fit into little boxes that were drawn for it...



.:.

BANK OF ENGLAND REFORM!!!

http://www.call4reform.org/2010/06/calm-before-the-storm-plans-for-the-campaign/

BANK OF ENGLAND REFORM!!!

EDGE MEDIA RESCUE PLAN!!! http://www.edgemediarescue.co.uk/

http://www.edgemediarescue.co.uk/

HERE'S YOUR CHANCE TO HELP SPREAD REAL NEWS!
EDGE MEDIA IS THE ONLY BRITISH STATION THAT COVERS CONTRAVERSIAL NEWS!
http://www.edgemediarescue.co.uk/

"Edge Media/Controversial TV is a unique platform for presenting news, views and information not normally found within the mainstream media. If you would like to contribute to the survival and further development of this channel please consider offering a donation by using on the links above.
If you would like to make a donation by cheque or telephone please email us at support@edgemediarescue.co.uk with a contact telephone number and write "Please Contact Me" in the subject line.
If you are unable to offer a financial donation, please consider helping us to promote awareness of the Edge Media Rescue appeal.

Thank you in advance for your support!
Keep visiting this page as it will be regularly updated"
http://www.edgemediarescue.co.uk/
http://www.edgemediarescue.co.uk/
http://www.edgemediarescue.co.uk/

URGENT! URGENT! URGENT!

Dognamedblue

Official lying...

It's big business and the news media has essentially
given up on doing anything about it.

But one group - WikiLEAKS - has been more effective at
revealing government "secrets" (i.e. official lies) than all
the US news media put together.

Daniel Ellsberg - who himself was targeted with assassination
by the Nixon White House - believes WikiLEAKS founder is
currently facing a similar threat.

If anything happens to Julian Assange, you can reasonably
assume it was murder by the US government...

...Under direct orders from the Obama White House which has
clearly stated that assassinating US citizens who "threaten
national security" is OK.

Video:

http://www.brasschecktv.com/page/862.html


- Brasscheck

P.S. Please share Brasscheck TV e-mails and
videos with friends and colleagues.

That's how we grow. Thanks.

================================
Brasscheck TV
2380 California St.
San Francisco, CA 94115

FOR SALE : ARTWORK








COPY ART: calder - pyramids '75 : sky swirl '74 : redfern expo '66 : Muse National d'Art Moderne '65 - mondrian - tableau 1 '21 - matisse - blue nude 1 '52 - lichtenstein - WHAAM! '63 :
(the rest are my own)

if you like, just ask for price +p&p & insurance
.dnb