Monday, 29 August 2011

the drugs don't work

I know, I speak from first hand testimony
I'm tired of being a virtual shut-in...



after 11 years of child abuse I'll be the first to admit that I need help, but their drugs, after 6 different ones, make me worse & the shrinks are no better, how can they be??? they don't have first hand experience of anything people like me went through, not as if anyone of them can tell me what it's like to think the next punch, the next kick is going to kill you, to be at the point when you have given up as the next thing is going to be your death, to be degraded, to be humiliated, what it's like to have to go through that time after time after time, their well intentioned "help" & "advice" is nothing more than insults... "do volunteer work" "do exercise" ... they really don't have the first clue, not as if I can talk to anyone that knows & everyone else senses you're a victim & then go about exploiting you & continuing the abuse... all that's left is being a shut-in...it is a nightmare you can not wake from. their drugs make you ill. their "psychology" is uneducated





I went to god just to see  
 And I was lookin' at me 
Saw heaven & hell there were lies 
When I'm god everyone dies

Each thing I show you is a piece of my death
No salvation
No forgiveness

This is beyond your experience
Forgiveness

.:.

6 comments:

dognamedblue said...

Your world is an ashtray
We burn & coil like cigarettes
The more you cry your ashes turn to mud

It's the nature of the leeches
The virgin's feeling cheated
You've only spent a second of your life
My world is unaffected
There is an exit here
I say it is & it's true
There is a dream inside a dream
I'm wide-awake the more I sleep
You'll understand when I'm dead

I went to God just to see
And I was looking at me
Saw heaven & hell there were lies
When I'm God everyone dies
Die scar - Can you feel my power?
Shoot here & the world gets smaller
Scar, scar - Can you feel my power?
One shot & the world gets smaller

Let's jump upon the sharp swords
And cut away our smiles
Without the threat of death
There's no reason to live at all
My world is unaffected
There is an exit here
I say it is & it's true
There is a dream inside a dream
I'm wide-awake the more I sleep
You'll understand when I'm dead

I went to God just to see
And I was looking at me
Saw heaven & hell there were lies
When I'm God everyone dies
Die scar - Can you feel my power?
Shoot here and the world gets smaller
Scar, scar - Can you feel my power?
One shot & the world gets smaller
Scar, scar - Can you feel my power?
Shoot here & the world gets smaller
Shoot, shoot, shoot motherfucker
Shoot, shoot, shoot motherfucker

Each thing I show you is a peace of my death

No salvation, no forgiveness
No salvation, no forgiveness
No salvation, no forgiveness (I said)
No salvation, no forgiveness

No salvation, no forgiveness (This is the idol experience)
No salvation, no forgiveness
No salvation, no forgiveness (Forgiveness)
No salvation (Forgiveness)
No forgiveness (Forgiveness)
No salvation (Forgiveness)
No forgiveness (Forgiveness)
No salvation (Forgiveness)
No forgiveness (Forgiveness)
No salvation (Forgiveness)
No forgiveness

I went to God just to see
And I was looking at me
Saw heaven & hell there were lies
When I'm God everyone die
Die scar - Can you feel my power?
Shoot here & the world gets smaller
Scar, scar - Can you feel my power?
One shot & the world gets smaller
Scar, scar - Can you feel my power?
Shoot here & the world gets smaller
Scar, scar - Can you feel my power?
One shot & the world gets smaller

Shoot, shoot, shoot motherfucker
Shoot, shoot, shoot motherfucker
Shoot, shoot, shoot motherfucker
Shoot, shoot, shoot motherfucker

This is beyond your experience
Forgiveness

Anon said...

Brilliant post.

Forgiveness is the answer.

Red - self confidence.

Yellow - optimism.

Green - nobility.

Blue - contentment.

We need all four.

Anon said...

The healing starts inside. The grain of mustard seed grows when nurtured.

dognamedblue said...

funny you should mention those colours
I've just learnt, by that I mean it's just dawned on me, how to mix colours, if you had a red yellow blue colour wheel then half way between yellow & blue would be green & opposite green would be red, so to darken green you'd add red, a new avenue just dawned on me

Anon said...

I'm going to experiment with colours and what happens when you put red (for example) next to blue, or red next to green, or red next to yellow.

dognamedblue said...

it's going to be fun :)